In my head

My peeps
This is to confirm that I keep my promise. Wassssuuuuppppp?

I want to give a shout out to everyone that left a comment on my post. You are the reason I am on blogville. I love you all and I will reply every comment soon.(I am feeling like a Gee se?). I am being lazy and the only time I have to reply all comment is in the nite (at home) and this feat is like trying to go to heaven…….dial-up connection in naija is anti-reply-a-comment. (Am I the only one in this? Both CELTEL & STARCOMMS)

As this post title signifies, these are just thoughts running through my head in the last one week so help examine my head.


I didn’t take Coca Cola on a particular Friday and by Saturday afternoon I felt like an addict suffering a relapse. Abeg Coca cola wan kill me? Had to run all over to get a chilled bottle and I felt better.Haaaa my own don better abi? Carl don get sister for Coke drinking spree.
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My peeps at home tried to persuade me to go out with them and the following conversation ensued;

Bro-in-law: Darkelcee, lets go out now because you can’t find husband with this your lifestyle. Your life revolves round Home, Office and Church. You need to go out often to hook up someone? (Please where exactly is this OUT?)

My 6yr Old Nephew: yesssssss now, she has been staying with us since. Mummy says before I was born? When will you go to your house?

See me see wahala, dem dey plan coup-de-tat for me in that house now.
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Please, how do oyinbo people think? I noticed that you can actually report a photo on facebook to the authorities! Reasons to report photo Include….nudity/pornography, Drug Use, violence, attacks individual or group. Please the question is wetin concern me to report another person’s picture?(Na jazz dem use carry me go look im profile?) I fit report my own? Who dey check the reports?
If we get our own facebook for naija, hmmmm gongo aso!. The guy in the console to monitor reports will never be at work.Infact, PHCN no go give them light to access reports at all. Fuel scarcity will back up PHCN strongly. And the site will be epileptic that you won’t be able to report anything! All hail NIGERIA!
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In the March Edition of Genevieve magazine, i read of a 23yr old naija chic who did breast enlargement / implant for a bloody sum of 4,000 British Pounds! (I dey craze?) I can’t even imagine getting one abi na buy we go call am? (Don’t need to anyway *wink*).

Please, take time out to watch Dr 92010 for a sneak into the getting one. The surgery can be compared with the process of making Asun (barbecued goat).

Heard you can use saline or silicone gel in the stuffing or filling? lollllll

Type 1
A portion of the boobs is opened up and somin that looks like Drip bag (Dextrose Saline) or Pure water bag is “tucked” into the breast and a balloon pump is inserted into the bag and then the pumping start. Air or whatever is pumped into the bag till the desired size is achieved. The “victim” is sown up and she wakes up with a bigger boobs.



Type 2
The “drip-bag” is already filled with the saline/silicone gel they forcefully tucked into the boobs. Pumping is not necessary.

Now the question is can this bag leak? Yes it can!


What if somin happens and it burst? Oh yes it does! You will only need to go for a “refill”.

Or the saline solution start to dry? Abeg, allow me to think like a novice here!

All these James bond moves is for what?

Note that this is not a bloodless surgery. !@#$%^&*_+


The recovery period varies from person to person. After the surgery, the doctor is going to put bandages around the breasts to prevent swelling. The bandages are worn for several days. After they are removed, you will need to use a surgical bra. This bra is designed to prevent excessive pressure and give enough support to your new breasts.For the first few days, the patient experiences pain and swelling.(suffering and smilling!)


The doctor will give you medication for pain.(please doctors should stop giving anything, sebi it is no pains no gain...Chikena!) The discomfort will gradually reduce within 10 days. Some swelling will still remain. The scars will look pink and larger in the beginning, but they will fade as time passes. It may take a couple of months to get back to your fitness routine, but depending on your type of work, within a few days you can return to work. Every case is different, so your doctor will tell you what is right for you……READ MORE

But really how many minutes do we have in naija before we start doing Whacko Jackco moves and our teeth, nose or tongue start falling off?

On a lighter mood!

BRA CODES

Enjoy your weekend